I have attachment issues

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Dear reader,

If I have sent this to you and we are dating. It is time to talk about Autistic Attachment problems as this may be something you have to deal with.

I would not send this unless deep feelings have developed. If we are at a point where deep feelings have developed then it is essential I tell you this.

I did not grow up with Secure attachments with my Divorced parents or extended family. I grew up as a burden that could be sent to Grandma’s house when I got too problematic!

It is also true that in August 2020 I left my ex boyfriend’s house in a Cop car to go to Safe Beds in Kingston Ontario. That was from not handling an adult break up well…

As of the time I am writing this article I don’t feel up for a new relationship. I am 27, exhausted & I nearly died a few times in September in the following ways:

  • Dehydration during break up hysteria after being kicked out of the Community Homeless shelter. This was by crying and walking a long way until I collapsed.
  • Infection from dirty soiled clothing.
  • Getting attacked by meth heads.

I have had a really complicated life that over complicates my already complicated Autistic psychology. A lot of the time I am by myself I get lost in my head or I contemplate my meaningless life in unhealthy ways. Conversations about working on myself are useless… All they have ever translated in to Autism Psychosis wise is masking symptoms that I should speak up about. You really need to take from this article that I struggle with my mental health and sudden separation could be a huge personal challenge for me. Still you are entitled to leave when you choose. You just don’t have any authority on how I behave post-separation. You really should just get far away like Kaylib Drury did.

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